It was a chilly Friday evening in old Sedville and many would find their weekend-starting libations at places like Fitter’s, Coach’s, Dukes and Boots and The End Zone. But the hardest rockers and the most magnetic metal heads found themselves at the American Legion for a night of smoking, drinking and eardrum injuring.
It was time for “Metalomedy II” (or “Metalomody, if you preferred to trust the apron sign on the sound board). The mics were checked, the keg was tapped and the patrons and performers alike had dressed up for the Friday before Halloween.
Among them was Dexter, a Viking, a horned clown, at least two demons, a jailbird in old-time pinstripes, an escaped marionette and a pair of natural disasters — both a hurricane and a tornado were in attendance, and the tornado even had a flap so she could use her phone and enjoy a plate of food or two from the extensive spread.
Now I know we need some filler music, but do we really have to hear “Monster Mash?” I know it’s close to Halloween, but it’s so cliché. Someone needs to remix that song.
The audience seemed to get more receptive to the performance as they got more drunk. It probably helped that the bands were getting a little better. But the dance floor, or perhaps just the head-bang floor, was well-populated and would probably stay that way.
And the most important thing was that I couldn’t find a single soul who wasn’t having a good time — sober or otherwise. I don’t think my face was melting, but the metal was sufficiently hard.
The Metalomedeers were getting restless — one of them pulled out a chair and challenged one of the demons to an arm-wrestling contest. I hope he didn’t lose his soul in the process.
It was just short of 10 p.m. and local stand-up comic Brian Pettis was almost being drowned out by loud reminiscing. What I could hear, though, was pretty darn funny.
“I’m not anonymous but I am an alcoholic,” joked Pettis.
It was a bad time for the urinal in the bathroom to be out of commission — the demand was going up because the food was generous: all-you-could-eat pork, chicken, scalloped potatoes and rolls, and the Bud Light was flowing.
“Due to the high overhead of providing keg beer and food, this will likely be the last time we run the show with so many free amenities,” wrote Seth Hofstetter on the “Metalomedy II” Facebook page the next day.
Yes, the musicians were skilled. Yes, the comics were funny. Yes, the time was good, but “Metalomedy” seems to suffer from the sort of problem that many eager-to-please event organizers deal with: trying to be more accommodating than the budget will allow.
Sometimes you try to do everything to draw the crowds but eventually you’ve got to scale back the comps and let the show bring in the people mostly on its own merits. They put on a good show and they will probably need to start a drink ticket exchange or something next time.
It would be hard for anyone who went to the second “Metalomedy” event to find anything to complain about. It’s just a shame they weren’t able to break even.
“For those that didn’t go — you missed out!” wrote Hofstetter.
And he’s right — it was quite a show.